9 Months N

Marriage can be frustrating, when communication is broken. I was so excited going into this marriage, thinking that everything would glide along wonderfully. Anytime we had an argument, I thought it was the worst thing ever. I tried so many unrealistic things...I tried to be sexy constantly, but that didn't work out too great, when it was time to go to bed. I had to wrap my hair up, and wear a bonnet to bed. I also tried cooking a meal for dinner everyday, but that was completely unrealistic since I work full time and am a full time student. I also tried doing all of the housework by myself, thinking that my husband would be so appreciative that he would pitch in a few times or do special things for me. That didn't work out too well, and I ended up yelling at him out of frustration.



His life seems so easy; he works, and comes home to his sports and video games. I get upset, because I'm jealous of how easy he has it. I, on the other hand, have to work, and go to school, when I get off. Then, I come home to a house to clean, a dog to attend to, a husband to feed, and homework to do. I can't wait until I graduate, but I digress. I started to think that something was wrong with us, because I spent a lot of time, arguing with him, because I felt like he just didn't get it. Honestly, I still don't think he does, but he asks more questions, as if he cares to figure it out.



Recently, we went to see Tyler Perry's new movie, Why Did I Get Married, Too? and received a new perspective on our marriage. I enjoyed seeing the couples work through some very difficult issues. We shared a couple of aha moments, and we even shared a smooch, during one part of the movie. We were reminded that people argue, but they still love each other. We had a great time at the movie, and I think we learned a lot, rather than simply taking it in as entertainment. I think it's crazy that we were looking for marital advice in a movie rather than from other, more experienced couples.

I call my mother for everything. I wonder if he ever calls anybody for advice. I'm sure women feel that we constantly try to find things to make our relationships stay fresh and work, while our men seem to go with the flow and be clueless about things.

I used to laugh at Everybody Loves Raymond. Now, I get upset at some of the things he does, because I can completely relate to Deborah. That's funny to even say, but it's true. I still laugh, because the show is funny, but I take every opportunity to make comments, whenever my husband watches the show with me. He has the nerve to say that he isn't as bad as Ray, but sometimes he's actually worse, in my opinion.